Today, I heard a great quote, spoken by Jack Ma, co-founder of Alibaba Group. He said that smart people know what they want, but wise people know what they do not want.Interesting. I have long told my kids (usually when they were groaning about some horrible experience they were forced to endure) that it is just as important to discover the things you do not like as it is to discover the things that you do like.
Not to throw shade on positive thinking, but maybe the "no's" in life deserve a little love and attention. After all, those do-not-want "dis" items -- discomfort, dismay, disease, discord, distrust -- really do have a powerful way of shaping our lives. They arrive along our path rudely unannounced and start setting up detours.
We then get to decide how we respond. Do we stop? Do we find a compromise? Do we try to climb over or dismantle the barrier? Do we find a way around it?
The basic philosophical purpose of "no's" seem to be prioritization. Struggles and pitfalls give us the chance to test our commitment and a seemingly valid reason to abandon ship. Wait -- do we really need permission to halt or change course, or should that just be an accepted part of the journey?
My dear friend Jackie wisely told me many years ago that it is much easier to decide to add something new to our lives than to know when it is time to stop. How true! We are addicted to the new, the forward motion, the constant more. It isn't nearly as fun to clean out the closet or end a relationship.
According to motivational speaker Tony Robbins, "Not getting your dream often gives you your destiny." Our job is to figure out how we can use this.
